Shocked And Humiliated. People Say The Meanest Things.

So as part of the deal I've made with myself to prevent the onset of full-fledged alcoholism, I only let myself buy scotch out of funds designated as "overtime" on my pay stub. Mostly because working the occasional OT shift gets me out of my darkened room where I sit and listen to Wagner while softly cursing Jennifer Aniston for starting the flat hair craze. I miss 80's hair.

This morning I show up at a store where I pick up some of these OT shifts from time to time. "Oh I'm glad you're here." The tech said as I struggled to remember my password. I should have known this was the first sign of trouble.

"And why do you say that?"

"The other pharmacist is mean"

"No, I think you're confused. I'm mean."

"Seriously, that other guy is rude. The customers hate him and it's hard to work like that."

You have no idea how much it hurt to hear these words. Why didn't these people just insult my mother?

I decide to show them who the drugnazi was. Next customer that came in got the silent treatment. What does he tell the clerk?

"That guy always gets my pills out fast. You should hire him full time"

DAMN YOU! CAN'T YOU SEE I FIND YOU BENEATH CONTEMPT? ARE YOU SO INCREDIBLY STUPID AS TO NOT SEE THE REASON YOU GOT YOUR ZYPREXA SO DAMN FAST WAS BECAUSE I CAN'T STAND TO SEE OR SMELL YOU?

A quick aside. Anytime anyone, anywhere, has ever told me I was a "good" pharmacist, what they have meant was that I was a "fast" pharmacist. No one has ever said to me "no pharmacist knows drugs that are responsible for CYP3A4 induction interactions the way you do drugnazi" and no one ever will.

Later on in the day an old lady brought in cookies. A drugnazi eating old lady cookies. Jesus I'm glad this is an anonymous blog. They were good.

After work a guy from the gas company showed up to light the pilot light for my fireplace. The pilot light wasn't the problem. The electric igniter had been unplugged before I left for vacation in June and I had forgotten about it. Where's the fucking scotch? I earned it today.