You've been here a few years now, and you may have noticed that there are parts of our home that are carpeted and parts that are not. Do you think that next time you cough up a hairball, that maybe....just maybe..... you might just consider leaving it somewhere on the 50% of the place that has bare floor? Just once? It might make for a nice change.
And what's with the way you chew my stuff? Holes in my clothes, bedsheets, furniture, even your own freakin' bed. I thought that kind of shit was for dogs. I was very clear at the SPCA that I wasn't interested in a dog, so seriously, there's no need for any inferiority type complex.
I also shower every day, making you licking my arm in the middle of the night when I'm trying to sleep completely unnecessary.
On the other hand, meeting me at the door when I come home from a day of dealing with pill-seeking barbarians is kinda cool. Feel free to continue this.
And the way you fall asleep on your back with your paw raised in what looks like a black-power salute is pretty funny, although I doubt you're aware of the political statement you're making.
...............oh hell...........never mind you furry freak. Just please stop chewing on the electrical cords. You might end up killing us both.
5 comments:
being a technician, i love my kitties, the 2 outside rush up to my car every night, i feed them and they purr welcome home and thanks for feeding me and talking to me nicely, which after a day of insults, and stupid people, the simpler things in life are nice, even kitties. I walk thru my door to 2 other kitties (the indoor ones) rubbing up next to me and welcoming me home, follow my every move and letting me know---your home, nobody is yelling at you and no phones ringing (because i've turn off the ringer) and they don't care what i drink or how much to get to sleep and wear off the day before the next starts again. Isn't this just sad???????????
rosebud
looks up from mixing a precise quantity of vermouth and gin
You speak truth oh Rosebud. I'm sorry you met such a horrible fate in Citizen Kane
Cats are lovely little creatures aren't they? I have 3 and they're all ornery but they're too damn cute to stay mad at. They sleep on their backs with all their legs sticking up in the air, they greet me when I come home. It's a lovely thing. I have 3 cats and a dog. It's like a zoo.
HA! this made me think of that episode of SNL when Will Ferell did that skit where he talks real sarcastically to his dog. Don't know if you ever caught that one, but I tell my cats now "Oh, don't worry about that poo you left right in front of the litter box that I paid $200 dollars for in order for you to poo in a clean box everytime you go, I just love to pick up shit after coming home from a hard day of work at a job I have just to provide food for you. It's ok, you cute little fat furry guy. I love you too!
*runs away*
*pauses.. whispers* ...kitty = scary.
....and that's my last comment for the day. *runs away again*
Post a Comment