Saturday, May 10, 2008

Understatement Of The Day.

I live for pharmacy my friends. I breathe it. 24/7 my mind is on the drugs. Like just now I was spending my spare time reading about anticholinergic side effects. There is no better way to spend a Saturday night, and probably no better illustration of why I am single.

My commitment to medicine is matched only by my appreciation for stupid proclamations. Which is why I found this statement from our friends at Merck to be so personally fulfilling:

Anticholinergic effects include confusion, blurred vision, constipation, dry mouth, light-headedness, difficulty starting and continuing to urinate, and loss of bladder control. Most of these effects are undesirable.


A twofer! Informative and idiotic at the same time! Exactly which of these effects is the desirable one you suppose? Maybe the confusion. In a world gone insane, anticholinergic-induced confusion may be the best way to cope.

The blurred vision may also help with this. I see no possible role for loss of bladder control though.

8 comments:

Christine said...

Can't see, can't spit, can't pee, can't shit. What else is there to read? ;)

Anonymous said...

I enjoy all of those things... with a desire and passion that can't be quenched... bring on the tricyclics baby!!!

Splat and Antisplat said...

I've taken hyoscyamine, dicyclomine, ipratropium (inhalation), tiotropium (inhalation), and, yes, even scopolamine. I can tell you first-hand that the desirable one is the constipation. In fact, that's usually why I was taking them. [Somehow or another, I made it out without the benztropine, despite having been on nearly every antipsychotic made in the last 20 years. It was touch-and-go with Geodon once, though...]

(And, yes, I love meds nearly as much as you, Mr. Monkey. Perhaps in another world, in another time, but alas, 'tis not meant to be for you and me.)

Anonymous said...

So it looks as though all I need is my trusty cholinergic drug to have a good life.

Anonymous said...

I'd still take dry mouth, blurred vision and the difficulty with urination-thing. It's kind of like being stoned with a UTI. I'm down with that.

See? There's always a silver-lining!

Anonymous said...

Does anyone else wish they could get a med history on someone before they dated them? Some hot girls not so hot once you see what they're on.

Anne said...

I'll admit it: I saw a bottle of Seroquel on a date's night stand and suddenly remembered that I needed to be at a meeting early the next morning, and also needed to never see her again. In fairness, the crazy was already beginning to show after just two dates.

Anonymous said...

Anti-SLUD :)

Hey you don't have to be single if you find someone to talk to about anticholinergic side effects.

Sometimes you find a fun favorite friend to talk to about it. And sometimes the friend has a steel trap brain and remembers that you already told that story before. 5 months ago. :)