Monday, May 26, 2008

From The Big Pharma Bizarro Ad File

Try to ignore the fold down the center of the ad. I tend to shove things into my pocket at work without thinking about how a crease mark down the center of a picture might look when I scan it into my computer:




So Kristalose is nice and clear and an alternative for people whose insurance will no longer cover Miralax since it went over the counter. I get it.

But why the hell is the lady staring into the sink like that? Kristalose is supposed to make you poop. What's that got to do with staring into the sink?

She doesn't look like she's washing her hands, she looks more like she's confused, or grabbing the sink in frustration. "My God it's been so long....and now I finally have to go ....but......dammit! Which one is where the poop goes and which one is for washing your hands? I can't remember!!!"

"I do remember how nice and clear that solution was when I took it though. That's important for some reason."

Perhaps someone should do some research on a possible link between Kristalose and early-onset Alzheimer's.

The lady staring into the sink like that kinda creeps me out. I'm going to spend the rest of the night trying to think happy thoughts.

14 comments:

Splat and Antisplat said...

LOL really! That's kinda scary that she's looking down the sink. Maybe she lost a contact. My mom's Appalachian folklore always said that looking into a glass of water in the sink would stop your eyes from burning when cutting an onion... Maybe that's what she was doing.

But Kristalose? Why take a clear solution when you can at least have something that tastes good!

Pharmer Mike said...

Maybe she couldn't make it to the toilet because her Kristalose kicked in too fast (or she saw the price) and she improvised in the kitchen... And now she's looking into the sink thinking "What the f*ck am I supposed to do now?!"

MrHunnybun said...

I'm confused. What's the advantage of this over cheap and cheerful Lactulose liquid? Besides teh taste presumably

To me the woman look as if she is bending over to be taken roughly from behind. That's why the photograph is strangely cropped.

From this I conclude that she is not constipated, just clearing her bowels for some hot-lovin' back-door action.

Jen said...

Perhaps she's giving the plumbing a pep talk for things to come. There's nothing quite like uncooperative plumbing to ruin your pooping plans.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps, after a long marathon session on the crapper, she finally managed to get up, and is now so weak and dehydrated she is having trouble standing on her own, and is using the sink to hold her up. And she is staring into the sink... because... um.... she dropped a cookie in there?

Anonymous said...

She's Probably retching from the taste. What's the cost for that crap anyway?

Anonymous said...

I thought it looked like she was going to vomit.

Anonymous said...

I think it's a subliminal thing. They are trying to make you think that it is just like water, not a drug at all. See the second faucet, how it is positioned to be right over the glass? Ironically, the problem with most of the people I talk to about constipation is that they don't drink enough (any) water.

woolywoman said...

Well, if it is tasteless, it might be easier to force down the hepatic encephalopathy people. You know, the folks who maintain their mental status by pooping five times a day. Cut back on the scotch, kay?

Anonymous said...

http://dontshootthepharmacist.com/flash.htm

Anonymous said...

She's looking for the glass of Kristalose...it's so clear she can't see it.

BTW...wouldn't "Krist-It's-Loose!" be a better product name.

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking more like the Dumb and Dumber bathroom scene. She didn't think it would kick in so quick and she's got Mr. Hotstuff on the other side of the door while she slips into something more comfortable.

Anonymous said...

I'm voting she's about to vomit, either:

a) the stuff tastes horrible
b) it worked the wrong way around

Surgeon In My Dreams said...

I have GOT to stop reading your stuff at work. You made me snort right out loud!