"OH COME ON!!!!! I SLID MY CARD ALREADY" The woman said as I got ready to assume the position, and my heart broke for the old wrinkly bitch. The way she summoned up the strength and quiet dignity to slide her American Express through the credit card reader again, when by all rights she should not have had to, inspired me to move forward in the struggles of my own life.
The first call I took was from a woman who wanted to know the time. She calls often and says she's blind and needs to know when to take her medication. For some reason I don't fuck with her, maybe because she does manage to tie in her insanity with pharmaceutical care, unlike a good portion of the wackjobs who get past my employer's voice mail. I did finally realize today though, that the woman takes her meds four times a day, and the store closes every night for 12 hours. I think she may be using me.
The next call I took was from a customer who wanted to know if their prescription had any refills.
"I don't see where we've ever filled that for you ma'am"
"Oh, you've never filled it, I get it through mail order. So do I have any refills left?"
I remembered the inspiration of the lady at the credit card machine and vowed to struggle on.
From the front register I received a report that someone demanded to exchange an empty box of dental floss for a new one. "It fell out, it was defective!" they said. They had also spit in it. That's why you stay in school kids, because when you're behind the drug counter wearing a white coat you don't have to be nearly as nice to people like that as that poor schlep up front had to be. You will, however, have to nervously do mathematical calculations upon receiving a prescription for 26.25ml of cefinidir and breathe a sigh of relief upon realizing that the physician's assistant absolutely walked the perfect line between the minimum effective dose of 26.24ml and 26.26ml, which would have been instantly fatal.
A person tried to pick up a prescription for their uncle who had died. Vicodin. Surprise!
As I made my exit through the store's front door to end this day's commitment to my employer, I saw the poor schlep who had to deal with the dental floss incident chase down a teenage girl.
"Ma'am.....you forgot your cash back!!"
"What? I get cash back? Wow! I didn't know that!!"
There you go, sometimes the karma of the credit card reader taketh away, but sometimes it giveth as well.
Goodnight.
4 comments:
I do sympathize with the woman in your first anecdote; I talk to machines all the time. Usually I attempt to cajole them ("stay green, traffic light, stay green please"), but I have been known to resort to threats ("okay, computer, don't make me reboot you!").
Mind you, I don't expect anyone else to take part in these one-sided conversations.
I caught myself talking outloud only once the past month to an inanimate object --a vain attempt to persuade a dying vehicle (battery and alternator going out) to make best use of centrifugal acceleration and momentum and disregard friction and gravity as we headed towards the Sears Auto Center on I-80 near Coralville, Iowa. (C'mon deario, you've made it this far, just a little further. C'mon. You can do it.) To no avail. We made good use of gluteus maximus and latissimus dorsi. Actually, there are quite a few good-hearted folks in those parts that stopped to assist us with a push or a jump.
The rest of the way, we had to rely on supplication and vague promises; if only we'd get home in time to cover Friday's shift.
Sometimes I cannot keep from bursting out laughing when I hear a ridiculous request (giggles that hurt your chest to hold them in), or keep from feeling a glare go across my forehead like a fierce samurai warrior, when but floss with spittle is just plain 'ick'.
I think maintaining a straight face is something learned from a very young age as a matter of discipline, maybe. Sometimes it's just plain difficult to keep from some sort of response when observing someone else handle the sideshow.
Otherwise, as suggested in the blog, it's all a learning experience.
i printed 2 dozen copies of your rant "your pharmacist may hate you..." and left them my the blood moniter machine at my local pharmacy. I hope this helps both pharmacist and customer understand each other.
I broke my ass laughing to this. I think that's the tragedy in it - it's funny because it's true. So tragically true...
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