The scene, inside an airplane somewhere between Iowa and New Hampshire last Thursday night, the laughter of Bill Clinton as he chats with a campaign aide is heard above the sound of jet engines:
Bill Clinton: "......oh man...what a week. I almost forgot how much I liked the mayor of Davenport. It was good to reconnect.....kinda wish I had made him Secretary of Agriculture now like I promised I was going to. Lots of good memories...." He knocks back the last of a scotch and soda.
Campaign Aide: "Remember when we went through.....where was it? Des Moines or Cedar Rapids? At that rally in '96 and a chick lifted her shirt and had "Bob Dole can suck these" written across her boobs? That's about all Mr. Viagra could have done with that woman."
Bill and the campaign aide again burst out in inappropriately loud drunken laughter. The rest of the plane is deathly silent. Hillary Clinton stares out of the window and snaps a pen in half.
Bill walks to the back of the plane and returns minutes later with two handfuls of food and drink. After settling into his seat he looks over at Hillary .....
"Doughnut?" He asks.
Hillary lunges across the aisle and grabs Bill by the testicles.
"I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DO NOT SHUT UP RIGHT NOW YOU WILL NEVER USE THESE AGAIN!!!!!!"
The tensest of all silences now engulfs the cabin. Hillary releases her death grip after about 30 seconds. Bill finishes his doughnuts and rises once again from his seat.
"We'll see how they get used" he mutters under his breath. He casually makes his way to the room where the stewardess is preparing coffee. They share a sly smile. Bill closes the door behind them.
Disclaimer: None of this actually happened. I'm just poking some fun at Hillary because she voted for the war and I hope she loses again on Tuesday.
You know what to do New Hampshire.