Friday, January 25, 2008

Tonight The Drugmonkey Is Dumbfounded. Write Down The Date, As This Does Not Happen Often.

Tonight I got a piece of fan mail from someone identifying themselves as a 5th year pharmacy student who said they have been reading my blog "as long as they can remember." Yet another sign of my impending old age gathers like a thundercloud on the horizon.

I have to admit experience has its advantages though. I take great pride in the ability I've developed over the years of answering pointless, meandering, substance-free questions with responses of equal quality. Don't get me wrong, real questions always get real answers, but there is such a thing as a stupid question. Everyone in the profession knows it, and I've had enough practice with them that I have perfected the art of the non-offensive blowoff. Or so I thought until tonight.

It started off normally enough. Middle aged non-retarded looking dude tells the tech he wants to talk to the pharmacist. Fine. Tech let's me know and I walk over. The guy is holding a box of nicotine patches in his hand. This is the entirety of his statement to me, complete and unedited:

"STEP ONE"

It was said in such a way that I don't know whether to put a question mark or an exclamation point at the end of the quote.

I waited for more. There was no more. I had no idea what to say to this fuck. He had a look of expectation on his face. Finally I said:

"Yup, that's step one. Just like it says on the box"

The man looked at me for a bit then walked off in a huff like he was convinced he had just talked to the stupidest person in the world.

I'm still not sure what this guy was expecting. I am still sure though, that I am perfectly capable of answering a question if you are capable of forming one.

3 comments:

Appleo Blush said...

Step 1: Pay for the box.
Step 2: Quit being a socially inept imbecile.
Step 3: Keep away from drug monkey.

Anonymous said...

Aren't you pharmacists able to read these patient's brilliantly wheeling dealing of a mind or what? haha..

But yes, I love awkward moments. They just stand there and stare, you stare back, awkward moment, they seem about to form a coherent sentence, forget what it was, then walk away. And we stand there like what the fuck just happened?

stlblues85 said...

If it makes you feel any better, my memory is not very good. Plus, young or old, I still think it would be hilarious to work just one day with you (i would bring a recorder)