The day started with an eerie silence. Ominous. Not to mention no messages on the voicemail. There are never no messages on the voicemail. The silence continued and 15 minutes into it I knew something was dreadfully wrong.
The phones were dead. So dead their corpse was cold. And while it was nice to be able to start the day being able to keep up with the workload those at the home office say we should be able to handle for a change, I knew that disaster was looming.
I will pause here and point out that I noticed the impeding disaster 15 minutes into my shift, and that the store opens an hour before the pharmacy. The numbnuts up front had not taken a phone call in an hour and 15 minutes and didn't have the slightest idea anything was wrong. Probably because they never took the class I did my third year in college entitled "How to tell if the phone is ringing."
I stepped into the leadership void and called the corpro-help desk. Disaster was avoided. I stared the day by saving the store.
The first phone call of the day was from a dentist who wanted to phone in a prescription for diazepam, 20mg an hour before the customer's dental appointment. A whopper of a dose. The customer was already taking temazepam 60mg at bedtime. A whopper of a dose. I told the dentist this and the dentist had no idea what the problem could be.
Let's pause again and have everyone not in the profession play a game. I'll call it "See if you're smarter than a dentist" Here are the rules; look at the last three letters in the name of the two meds the customer above would be taking and see if you have any idea what the problem could possibly be. If so, you're smarter than a dentist.
So I started the day by saving the store and then by saving a customer. That's what I do. I save stuff. Which is why I make so goddamn much motherfucker.
Overheard as the day's routine prescription filling got under way:
Customer: "Where is the corn medicine?"
Front-end clerk: "I think over by the seeds"
I now have some sympathy for the customers who insist on asking only me where the random shit they want to buy is located.
"Oh I'm in a lot of pain!!" said the customer who came in shortly before lunchtime. "Where are your stomach medicines!!??"
"Down aisle 2" Replied my keystone tech.
"What do you recommend!!!???"
"Let me have you talk to the pharmacist"
"I don't have time!!! I'm in too much pain!!!"
The extra time involved, I will point out, would be about how long it would take for the customer and/or myself to bridge the approximately 10 feet between me and my keystone tech. I always wondered why insurance company helpdesks felt the need to tell you if you were calling due to an emergency to hang up and dial 9-1-1. As I watched the stomach lady run out of the store emptyhanded, I understood.
About an hour later someone called and asked what "buy one, get one free" meant, which made me really happy I went to all that effort to fix the phones.
In the background Barry Manilow sang "Daybreak," and I could not help but to hum along. Someday I will tell you the story of how Barry Manilow is a scar upon my soul.
Tied up on the phone again, I heard a customer ask if he should take his naproxen with food. I banged on the counter to get my tech's attention and nodded "yes." If you're a pharmacy student, take heed. Your professors won't tell you this, but some days, that's as close as you're gonna get to having an opportunity to counsel someone in the real world.
The day ended with a 5-minute till closing time phone call.
"Do you sell something to measure the downward pressure being put on a jar, like peanut butter, when you open it?"
I cannot convey to you with words the urgency that was in this person's voice.
"No ma'am, I'm sorry, we don't"
"I guess I should ask a physics teacher, huh?"
I started the day by saving the phones, which I thought was a good idea at the time.
9 comments:
o dear drug monkey PLEASE tell me the one about the dr who falsified his scientific study
tnt
If the person wanting to know how to measure the force it takes to open a jar ever calls again, tell them to try a physical therapist's office. After shoulder surgery, my doc said no pushing or pulling of more than 10 pounds. I wondered how many pounds of pressure it took to open a child-resistant prescription vial. My PT measured it.. 10 pounds pushing, plus an un-measurable amount (at least with his tool) of force for the torque. Ah - no vial opening for a while for me.
Dontcha just love the phones???
"Tied up on the phone again, I heard a customer ask if he should take his naproxen with food. I banged on the counter to get my tech's attention and nodded "yes." If you're a pharmacy student, take heed. Your professors won't tell you this, but some days, that's as close as you're gonna get to having an opportunity to counsel someone in the real world. "
Nothing truer has ever been written on this blog...if I had a dollar for every counseling session i've had by nodding, banging, whistling, while doing something else, I'd be a billionaire.
I would be more curious to know how much force is needed to pry a 30 g wad of peanut butter from one's palate with one's tongue.
I heard a story from a physics-teacher friend of mine who relayed the story of a nursing student who truly thought that 0.5 was equal to 5. This explains the 2008 election to me perfectly.
Couldn't you just use a regular, bathroom-type scale?
Do you sell something to measure the downward pressure being put on a jar, like peanut butter, when you open it?
If she had asked a physics teacher, she would have gotten scolded for using the word "pressure" when she should have used the word "force"... wooohoo physics!
This is hilarious! Bravo! great writing talent. Like a nice dry pinot served with bittersweet chocolate. delicious.
Outstanding post. Well done.
20mg diazepam ontop of 60mg temazepam might zonk a person out, but wouldn't otherwise harm them. I think the larger concern would be that, because of tolerance, 20mg diazepam wouldn't have much of an anxiolytic effect, and hence, would not have met the dentist's treatment goal of providing anxiolysis during the dental procedure.
Did the dentist call back and order something stronger?
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