It's Like The Pharmacy Oscars. With A Lot Less Fashion Sense And A Lot More Ego.

Good evening ladies and gentlemen and can't you just FEEL the excitement in the air!!!!! I'm currently outside the Los Angeles Convention Center, which this night has been transformed into the center of the pharmacy world as the profession anxiously awaits the announcement of the year, the honor of honors in the drugs, the presentation of the APhA H.A.B. Dunning Award!! I don't have to tell you tonight what is going through the minds of almost everyone involved in the pharmacy universe when they see that....

"Who the hell is H.A.B Dunning?"

For the less than 25% of pharmacists who are APhA members though, that question needs no explanation. H.A.B Dunning is the biggest opportunity they have to pose in front of a camera while holding a plaque, and in an organization that can shake hands while posing for a picture like no other, that makes this night like Christmas and the Super Bowl and the climax of a Roman orgy all rolled into one!! Wait! I think I see a pharmacist making her way down the red carpet now!!!!

Oh...no....that's actually just someone with an MBA holding a large check made out to APhA. We'll let you know if any actual pharmacists show up.

In the meantime you can cut the tension inside the auditorium with a knife! In a year when such progress towards moving the profession towards the patient centered counselling, medication monitoring, drug fact knowin' future we've all been promised for two decades now has been made, the excitement over who will get credit for the game-changing changes that have taken place in our profession is building to a fever pitch!!

I mean, what better way to show you're in touch with actual practitioners of the profession than to talk about how pharmacists are now "empowered to provide preventative care to the patients they serve." Am I right? Who out there is feeling nice and empowered? No wonder APhA is so popular!!!!

And now the moment we've all been waiting for.....the winner of this year's H.A.B Dunning master handshake of the year........

WAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLGGGRRRRREEEEEENNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's right my friends! The purveyor of the POWER program is now the apex of professionalism in the pharmacy world! As the official APhA press release says:

Walgreens has supported American Pharmacist’s Month since its inception, bringing the message to consumers that pharmacists are an integral part of health care. Each October, “Know Your Medicine, Know Your Pharmacist” is spread across the country through Walgreens stores. This ongoing support has allowed professionals and student pharmacists to wage a large and effective public relations campaign across the country.

But wait, there's more!!!

Walgreens is also the largest retail provider of MTM services. These programs have allowed pharmacists to move from behind the counter to provide comprehensive health services to the community.”

Out from behind the counter you guys!!! This is awesome! Let's get a reaction from an actual Walgreens pharmacist:

--as far as walgreen's being a healthcare provider and actually caring about consultations, etc...that is the biggest joke i ever heard...all i do is ring out bull**** items.....in my store, i ring out jack daniels with bags of junk food and candy with pateints metformin, etc...it used to make me laugh...now it makes me very upset that a company would belittle their pharmacists this way.

That's great!!! You keep on keeping empowered my friend!! How about another pharmacist's take:

rphs....or pharmD's like i am....how do you feel about never EVER using your mind for anything anymore.....when i worked @ CPO at least i got to talk to patients about interactions, etc...(mind you there were 300 calls a day which kills your throat and is like a sweat shop)....but in the stores i honestly do nothing with my mind except think (hmm, does this 104 year old woman need her scotch and vodka double bagged with her orange juice and bread?).....clinical knowledge is forever lost

Allright then, making a difference in the community......and you sir, could you talk about Walgreens commitment to healthcare privacy?

i asked about the privacy issues with trying to take voicemails at the register while counseling patients while trying to talk to doctors about allergies or refill too soons on oxycontins etc all while there are 15 customers staring at you......keep in mind you have no ability to use a phone where you used to work because that is used by techs only.....the answer i was given was "some pharmacists have the screen up on their computer with pateint information and bounce back and forth between hiding behind bays while talking about something private and bouncing back to remember what was on their screen"....i said "you do realize that privacy and hipaa laws are broken every single day, right?"...they said "there are no real good answers for that question...we can merely suggest ways to help...but this process is not perfect"

Leading the profession into the future....with just a touch of humility. Oh Walgreens, could you be any dreamier?

Well that about raps it up for this year my friends, I'm off to the afterparties, secure in the knowledge my scotch is properly double bagged. Until next year, when we'll gather to honor innovations in customer restroom guidance, I'll leave you with this thought:

The APhA awards and honors program is the most comprehensive recognition program in the profession of pharmacy.

On that we can all agree. No one passes out the recognition like the APhA.

Just imagine what it would be like if that recognition was the least bit tied to reality.