The National Community Pharmacists Association (NCPA) started noticing an increase in pharmacy robberies about a year ago. As a result, it started a program to help its members prevent and deter robberies.......NCPA is also seeking congressional designation for "Protect Your Pharmacy Week," its annual awareness campaign, which will take place April 13 through April 17.
"We believe such support will help raise public awareness of the issue," (NPCA senior director of communications and marketing outreach Valerie)Briggs said.
"After all" Briggs didn't go on. "Now that the wars in Afganistan and Iraq have been wrapped up successfully and the global economic meltdown is behind us, we at NPCA can think of no better use of time for the 111th Congress than letting people know that robbing a drugstore is a bad thing."
As the auto industry collapses around him, 29 year old Martin Briggs of Detroit would seem to perfectly illustrate the payoff of NPCA's courageous efforts.
"I feel a little foolish admitting it now" said the recently laid off Chrysler assembly worker with a budding narcotic addiction. "But until I saw this proposed piece of legislation being discussed on C-Span the other day while I was crushing some Oxycontin tablets, I had no idea that waving a pistol around at the pharmacy and demanding drugs without paying for them was a bad thing to do. Now I realize it's important to obtain a proper prescription first, and then rob a 7-11 to acquire the funds to pay for it."
"NPCA changed my life" Briggs concluded. "Do you ever feel bugs on your skin in the middle of the night? I've been feeling bugs on my skin a lot all the sudden"
Experts predict that should NPCA be successful in actually getting members of the United States Congress to take seriously this turd of an idea, pharmacy robberies will go down by a factor of at least 50%.
"It's counterintuitive I know", said noted fictitious Harvard sociologist Howard Malone. "But the average street criminal is influenced a great deal by meaningless proclamations from their congressional delegation that have no force of law." He pointed to the dramatic fall in accidental asphyxiations among gang members after Congress declared "National Heimlich Maneuver Awareness Month" in June of 2005.
Malone then paused for a few seconds, burst out laughing and said "I was just fucking with you. No one pays attention to this stupid shit. Now get out of my office"
10 comments:
Which will be so helpful to us while we're getting screamed at by old biddies about the Digoxin recall, the Roxicodone 30 shortage, the Imdur crap shoot (60s this week or 30s? Which will we have on Monday morning...), and the musical cholesterol tango between brand and generic Toprol XL. To hell with robbery concerns; we're not going to have any damn drugs to *steal* if this keeps up...
Although it would be interesting if NCPA actually does something meaningful. Besides the fact that violent crimes will rise with a slowing economy, let's see if we can jerk a few politicians around.
Rather than that, NCPA can do something useful (ie installing bullet proof glass in every retail pharmacy), but the likelihood of them doing anything close to useful is practically nil (dare I say close to APhA standards!?).
Useless bs is hilarious..the cdc just released data that pets are major contributors to falls...wtf r u supposed to do with this info...watch out fluffy and spot..your days are numbered.
I propose a "Protect Us From NCPA Week." Now excuse me while I go snort some Oxycontin. I hope it will change my life.
OMFG, both technicians were sick today!! worst day ever
We've had two armed robberies in the last two years and I've been lucky enough to be there both times and have to directly deal with the individual. I find it humorous when they post shit like this because most of them have no idea what it's actually like.
Well, more mindless drivel from your keyboard. Just wait till the oxycodone fiend comes to your pharmacy with a 44 and wants the "good stuff" and your money now, or it's Good Night Terry.
Our helpful info from corpo to stop robberies----don't tell the patient the day your narcotic order comes in...."I am sorry we don't have this in stock and I can't tell you when we will because you may rob me, just keep checking back" That'll go over real big. And when the customer complains to corpo that we wouldn't tell them when their drugs would be in, corpo will give them a $25 gift card, because they LOVE giving away money to the whiners!!
Yep, robberies are fun. At my current place of employment, we have a little retail outlet in front of our inpatient section. Two for one, folks, 'cause my administrator is not 'in love with' cameras and doesn't see the need for a panic button, either. Fortunately, her office is right down the hall, so if there is any airborne lead, maybe it'll get her attention quickly.
Staff know to just give whoever whatever they and their weapon ask for. With a little luck, they'll live through it. Security is nonexistent, imho, and it's going to stay that way until we get hit.
This is what we do for a living. Tell me why it's different from prostitution?
With all these pharmacy robberies, I now fear going to the pharmacy, because I may get shot when the pharmacy is robbed. From now on I am going to buy my drugs on the street.
Post a Comment