Thursday, May 23, 2013

Crucified And Reborn. You May Now Refer To Me As Pharmacy Jesus.

It's been the worst kept secret in the world here in my little corner of the pharmacy world, and those of you who haven't caught on by now deserve to know.

I bought my own drugstore.

I'm not kidding you. I could drive to the nearest pharmacy right now, unlock it, and fill you a prescription if you had one. Because that nearest pharmacy would be mine. I can do whatever I want, including telling you to get the fuck out.

Here's the thing though, now that I *can* tell people to get the fuck out....I have yet to meet anyone I would want to say that to. I said during my entire sentence toiling away for the chains that I would act like a professional as soon as I was treated like one, and the people of this community have called me on that. They're glad I'm here. Person after person has shaken my hand and welcomed me to town. I go about my day to day routine and people want to stop and make friendly smalltalk. I had almost forgotten what friendly was like. One man routinely brings eggs from his farm and I had no idea how yellow egg yolks could be. Not one person has asked me why their prescription is taking so long.

Probably because it never takes that long to fill one. It's amazing how much quicker things can move when there is no corporate bullshit and there is the freedom to staff a workplace adequately.

This may be bad news for you though, if you are a fan of my little blog garden, as I fear I may have turned into the pharmacy blogger version of Aerosmith. The creative process when done well almost always feeds off misery, and I gotta be honest, I haven't been miserable in a good while now. Haven't had so much as a sip of scotch in at least two months, and that is the God's honest truth. So if you start reading my posts and begin secretly begging me to get back on the sauce the way I so desperately want Steven Tyler to get back on the smack, I understand.

But it's not gonna happen. I haven't been this unmiserable since college.

So, I'll try to come here and check in and entertain from time to time, but if I have learned nothing else, it is that running a business...and I mean running a business and not just "managing" a pharmacy by paying attention to the metric of the month, is an incredible time suck. There aren't many free minutes in my life right now my friends, but there is so much less stress.  I wish Rite Aid would have fired me years ago, but I understand now why it couldn't happen.

You see, my time in your pharmacy world was necessary. These last 20 years in retail have only been preparation to show you the way out. Crucified and now reborn, I await for you to follow the path to redemption I have blazed. I realize now, I am pharmacy's chosen one.

I am... Pharmacy Jesus.


27 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Congrats! (By the way, DM, please do NOT open up your pharmacy after hours for a customer without a safety net in place. For our sake and yours!)

Anonymous said...

Incredible, good for you :)

keyrx said...

Congratulations, O blessed & anointed! Long may you run!

Mama Dobble said...

That's pretty damned great. Congratulations, I hope everything stays positive for you. :)

Unknown said...

I left Rite Aid going on 2 years ago to start my own place. That was after 13 years at Rite Aid and watching all the fun get sucked out of the job.
I have been open for 1.5 years and it really is a whole new profession. No yelling customers, everyone is just pleasant. gives you faith in humanity again.
Though the corporate complaints will probably cease as life gets better, I suspect there will be still plenty of insurance hatred to spill into a blog. Enjoy yourself man, Cheers

Bula said...

Reading this brought tears to my eyes. I'm so glad for you and must admit that I am envious. How did you do this? Did you purchase an independent or open up a whole new pharmacy?

I just turned 30 and at this point I'm saving as much as possible and paying off the mortgage asap just to leave the profession. I don't hate the profession, I hate the giant corporation I work for. Sigh.

Matt Baker said...

Awesome. Good on ya DM!

Wrong Aid said...

Congrats! I would love to see you post updates on independent life. How its going. What to avoid. Advice on how to get started. You could really stick it to these fools at Rite Aid (which I unfortunately work for) if you could encourage just half a dozen people to go at it for themselves. Do it man. Change your whole page. "The Independent Pharmacist". You can have the name. Bring these guys down one town at a time.

Karin said...

I'm so happy for you! Score one for the good guys!

Anonymous said...

Rock on DrugMonkey! Those of us who live our lives through you are happy for you. You're being the pharmacist so many of us want to be, but are as nut-free as many class rooms and airplanes.

Tonina said...

Congratulations! I hope the new job grants you all the professional satisfaction you've craved and deserved for years. As for lack of inspiration for the blog, never fear! It might be all sunshine and (Actiq) lollipops at your new job, but there are still a multitude of miserable pharmacists and techs to report in about new idiotic/insane/life-threatening schemes from RA, CVS, & Walgreens.

Best of luck with the new place, PharmaChrist!

Miss Margo said...

I am very, very happy for you. Ever since I started reading your blog, I'd think of you from time to time as I stood in the cashier's line at my local corporate drug store hellhole and wonder how you could bear it.

Congrats on your liberation and the comfort you've found in your new community. And congrats re: the scotch.

Anonymous said...

Nobody likes a quitter, get back on the sauce.

Joe Zorek said...

Congrats!!!

CVS informer said...

You're fucking awesome!!!

Scritches.com said...

I'm so happy for you, Drug Monkey! Don't kill yourself working too long and hard; take time to be happy.

If I'm ever out west and need some (legal) drugs I'll give you my business.

Jason DeVillains said...

Congratulations!

If I opened my own pharmacy, I would be advertising the hell out of it.

What's the name of your pharmacy and where is it located? Can you provide a link for all of us to share with each other?

bcmigal said...

Yippeee!!!! Hooray, hooray, hooray!!! Well done!!!

Miss Margo said...

@ Beloved Parrot:

No idea who you are, but you have the most awesome screen name ever.
I have parrots whom I adore.

And yeah just to reiterate: three cheers for you, DM. God what a fuckin relief.

ThatDeborahGirl said...

Man, I am so fucking happy for you and proud of you. You did the damn thing and did it well! Hell yeah!

Romius T. said...

this is the coolest news I have ever heard. when i finally get fired myself (again) i will look you up and be one of those vagrants that make small business owners cringe.

Can i just borrow your washroom, please???

Anonymous said...

Wonderful news - personally and professionally! I recently started a new job as PIC of a behavioral health residential treatment facility. I love it! Congratulations! Marie Rodriguez - Tennessee

Anonymous said...

Yeah! Marie in Tennessee

MiserableDrone said...

Congrats Drugmonkey! I've been a lurker of your blog for a long time now and I'm truly, whole-heartedly happy for you. For me, I'm a new grad and when I'm done doing time for chains I'll DEF start my own establishment where I can practice pharmacy. Again, I hope nothing but the best for your new store, good luck!!!

Anonymous said...

As your first act of freedom. You should put a sign out reading "if you attempt to steal, you will be shot." And keep a 12 gauge somewhere behind your counter or a pistol on your person. 'Merica! In all seriousness, congrats.

Anonymous said...

Congrats hope it works out!! Next up blogs about how cvs/Caremark are forcing your patients to go to cvs,mail order destroying our business, how more and more drugs are being reimbursed below acquisition, and how ridiculous audits from the board of pharmacy are ;(

Ann said...

I have been out of the loop for a while....glad to see you are back to writing and even happier that you are an owner now!!

My last day as a retail pharmacist was the end of January. I then did a 12 week temporary gig in an Equine pharmacy. Then I moved to California! I have no desire to get licensed here and my pharmacy days are behind me! Life is good!
Congrats to you!